I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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