If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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