$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
