You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
