so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize