More tranny stories later!
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
