I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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