JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
