While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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