I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
NoShamevember. You game?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
