Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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