Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry queenofblingland hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?

Fav 4 1383 1430
share tweet
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

wow.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

yeah, it was that bad.

Fav 18 993 4647
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(573): View more from Missouri

how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?

Fav 7 3507 857
share tweet
(732): View more from New Jersey

I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at

Fav 20 4958 823
share tweet
(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.

Fav 15 2380 6948
share tweet
(302): View more from Delaware

he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"

Fav 32 7617 2570
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(209): View more from California

found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.

Fav 7 1394 4154
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(501): View more from Arkansas

All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement

Fav 5 927 547
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.

Fav 4 809 320
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT