It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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