that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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