I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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