a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
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