New low: just hacked my moms facebook
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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