Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize