Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Sorry about my life...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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