Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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