I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
