idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
