we're blogging at a bar
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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