But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
