Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
