Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize