I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
