WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
He passed out mid-signature
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
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