nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
