two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
She's like a pop up book from hell.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
