His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
