Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
