...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
