maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Actions speak louder than pants.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
