I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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