I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
