People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
