Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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