Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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