you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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