How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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