Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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