I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
