mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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