My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
