I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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