What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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