just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
