Having a random hookup so left but love u
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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