Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
