apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Randomize
