There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You ate ashes out of my bong
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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